I Can Be Thin by Then – Can’t I?

i can be thin by then cant iI Can Be Thin by Then – Can’t I?

Even though I write a blog entitled THRIVE ANY WEIGHT and I coach others to live a life they love in spite of what size they are, that doesn’t mean I don’t occasionally yearn to have a better body for an upcoming event. There are so many levels to wanting to lose weight before a making some sort of a public appearance, whether it be a wedding, reunion, celebration, public speaking event. I know many go through this and I guess I wondered if our thought process was similar. Add any of your additions below and let’s see who relates. Thanks

So this is my thought process.

  • I hear about the event and commit to going
  • Somewhere a long the line I decide I want to look better for it
  • I envision a new outfit and being complimented for the way I look
  • I imagine being the belle of the ball
  • I think about doing something everyday but the more I do, the less successful I am
  • I begin to get frantic as the time gets closer
  • I start to renegotiate my options – (maybe I can lose 10 pounds if I start today)
  • As the day gets closer I beat myself up a bit for not taking action
  • I consider not going
  • I throw in the towel and say, Oh well, I will just look frumpy one more time.
  • I dread the event getting closer
  • I scrounge to find something tolerable to wear
  • I go feeling ‘less than’
  • I have no more than an ‘OK’ time
  • I can’t wait to go home
  • I vow never to do this again

I am not sure if I can promise not to have this debilitating scenario happen again. What I can promise is this. I will implement the following into the process.

My New Process:

  • I will look forward to a fun event
  • I will look as wonderful as possible
  • I will sit up straight, smile and be noticed
  • I will be a shining star
  • I will be social and dance and feel alive
  • I will appreciate who I am and all of my magnificence
  • I will feel the energy of the day and my entitlement to be there just the way I am
  • I will have the best time
  • I will accept more invitations to do the same

Enjoy your life, no matter what your size. You are much more than your weight.

Enthusiastically,

Fran

Read This weeks Diary of a Mad Dieter

i pray i lose 100 lbs before the wedding

Girl Undresses for a Cause -Body Image Has Many Perspectives

I watched this video today (below) about a woman who took her clothes off for a cause. The message is about body image. As a large woman, I wonder how many others think to themselves…’she has a great body, what does she have to be concerned about’? That thought lasts for about a minute until I realize that body image goes deep and wide. Some of the most attractive people can’t see their own beauty. I begin to wonder not only what brings people to a place of abusing their bodies with over, under or abusive eating, but what happened to bring them to a place of loathing their bodies or body parts? When did it become so important to remove a wrinkle instead of being proud of the experience that created it? When did the scars of childbirth become something to be ashamed of? When did who we really are become unacceptable?

I am happy to see many movements out there that support inner beauty and self acceptance. I still think we are a long way off, partly due to the pressure of the media and the inflicted opinions of others.

For today, I would like to invite you to have a moment with yourself. One where you look at yourself or close your eyes and feel yourself and cite the following: ‘Just for this moment I accept who I am, inside and out. I look and feel the way I do because that’s who I am. I don’t need to change or defend anything. I will be in a loving place with myself for as long as I can hold that space and will do it as often as I remember to do so. Because I am beautiful and worthy of hearing good things about me. From me. For me. Because I AM ME!!’

 

JUST ONE LITTLE THING

Just one little thingDoing just one little thing a day can make all the difference in our lives.  We often try to accomplish such large feats that we sabotage our success with overwhelm.

For those of us who have weight issues, we tend to neglect ourselves if we have been in the ‘failing at everything we try’ mode. We may give up taking care of our personal grooming. We may stop caring about our emotional needs and we may even stop feeling good about our future.

I find that when I start to feel any of those things, it’s time to bring in the good and let go of some of the bad. What does that mean? It means whatever you CAN do at this very moment, is what you can do…. and not try to push yourself more than you’re ready for.

Some days all I can do is think a slightly positive thought. ‘Today I bring healthy thoughts into my mind’. Or I will drink an extra glass of water or stretch some part of my body for a few minutes.

The idea is to take a step, whatever size you can, whenever you can and begin to build momentum. I know most of us have heard this before, yet we don’t really do that one little thing that can get the ball rolling.  You don’t have to take a full step forward, sometimes a pinky toe in the right direction can make all the difference in the world.

So, I ask you this – can you start each and every day asking yourself – ‘what little thing am I willing to do to move me forward today? If you do this, I would love to hear from you – about what you chose to do and what results it brought. Thank you for being in my life. Together we can support our blissful future.

Many blessings

Fran

Living Large – Stop Being Stopped by Your Weight

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Often large women play life very safe. They stay close to home, socialize with the same people and go to work and back and that’s it. Does this sound like you?

Who’s to say that being large can’t mean that you can live large? What keeps you from stepping outside your comfort zone to spice things up a bit?

Recently I felt a strong pull to pick up and move to Asheville, NC after being in South Florida for 37 years and in the same home for 27. I don’t completely understand why I was brought here but I must tell you that not only did it blow my own mind to do this but it blew everyone elses mind.

I know no one here in Asheville. I am a large woman, no partner and going around making new friends and building a new life. Is it scary? Yes. Am I homesick and confused by my decision? Yes. Am I damned proud of myself for not letting my size stop me from living large? You bet I am.

Being large is not a prison sentence unless you make it that. You must know that I am not an advocate for woman to be and stay large. I am an advocate for those of us who are moving towards our ideal body to be doing something stimulating simultaneously.

I actually have this idea that by my doing this daring move to North Carolina and planning more daring things in the future that it may be one of the important pieces in my physical wellness. After all, isn’t it possible that I have been overeating because I was living a less that passionate life?

What are your thoughts about living large? What do you do and what’s next?

Enthusiastically,
Fran

For more about Fran Asaro go to www.thriveanyway.com

Ugh! Yoga?

[tweetmeme]I remember wanting to go to a yoga class but was embarrassed by my weight. I rarely saw a large person in the classes and I was large. Then I remembered the time I went to the gym every day to walk. No one made fun of me and many people acknowledged me. It felt great.

So off I went to my first Hot Yoga class. Insecure and challenged physically. Oh yes, I thought I would die the first day from the heat, and the postures. Who gets into those positions? I needed a lot of coaxing and even used a strap to help me grab my ankles. I’m sure there was grunting and heavy breathing as well. At first I was uncomfortable getting so much help, but then I saw thin people using straps and getting instruction as well. Apparently not everyone’s body is yoga ready when they come to class.

Well, I did eventually get into the positions. Maybe not perfectly but the difference from the first day was amazing. . I lost only some weight at first, yet my body began to adjust to the movement and respond. OH MY, can I really do this?

I continued in that class for several months and lost 80 pounds. It was more significant that I did this for myself then the weight loss. I stood straighter. I felt proud, and I didn’t feel awkward any longer. I invited several of my friends to join me. They were much thinner than I was. It was obvious by the evil eyes and death threats that this was not for them. I of course felt as though I had just conquered Mt Everest.

Eventually, I saw that what stopped me were my own fears and thoughts about what would occur. I may have been judged by others but I never heard it. And even if I had, who says those people don’t judge everyone else too? It’s very important for me to stop my own limiting thoughts since they are much more prevalent than the comments I fear from others.

Enthusiastically,
Fran

For more information on Fran Asaro go to www.thriveanyway.com

Enough Already

[tweetmeme]So you’ve been trying to lose weight. Maybe you’ve been successful or maybe you haven’t. Either way, what have you done with the rest of your life?

Many of us who long to lose weight will stay so focused on that and ignore our aspirations and visions. We may say “it will have to weight until I am thin”. And for some, years may have passed and so many dreams with them.

What if for a moment in time we stopped waiting for the weight to fall off and begin having a great life in SPITE of it? What if while we were losing weight, looking for the ideal weight loss program or after we’ve lost our weight, we begin to venture out of our comfort zone and explore life and that which we are entitled to do?

Imagine stepping out to go dancing – YES while you are still large. Imagine taking singing lessons, joining a social group or better yet, beginning one yourself! Ahhh, to some this is very scary or even taboo. After all, it’s unacceptable to be your size so you ought to beat yourself up and hide in your home until you are perfect right? WRONG.

Believe it or not there are those of us who are plus size and are STILL going dancing, dating, taking classes and buying beautiful clothes. There are those of us large and lovely women who are launching new businesses and finding our rightful place in the world.

Which do you prefer? I named my mother company Thrive Any Way to inspire others to thrive in spite of their current circumstance. I named this project Thrive Any Weight for the same reason. There isn’t a reason you cannot thrive in life. And I want to help you see that.

For today I invite you to do something new. Say Enough already and step outside your comfort zone. Dress with more color. Put on make up. Say hello to someone you are attracted to. DANCE!!!! What ever it is, begin today to explore your aliveness. Just a little. Ok, maybe a LOT! Whatever you choose, have fun!

Please check back for more of the Thrive Any Weight Blog.

Enthusiastically,
Fran

For more information about Fran Asaro go to www.thriveanyway.com